Christmas

Christmas is almost here and I end up freaken sick. -sigh- But I have good news. 1) I got everything I wanted 4 Christmas and my birthday! 2) I’m going to be able to see my dad! 3) C.A and I are talking again ( i know i said i didnt care but… idk… hez jus a reali nice friend). Now for  the bad news 1) have loads of work to do 2) wont see my dad 4 my bday and until spring-sigh- 3)still sick.

Also, I have found a new song that I feel inlove with. Every time I hear this song I think about key which is so rediculous considering we aren’t even mad at each other. “Mad” by Ne-Yo. I am also inlove with “Fall for you”, and “Light on”. I cannot remember who they are by yet. Neopets are awesum! -giggles- oh, and Lawrence is freaken crazy. He kept on lifting me up today like if I weigh nothing! And Tashawn also lifted me up..-weird-And its even weirder how I find myself slightly attracked to Sherick.-the boi kool dude- idk y. Okay, I kind of do. He keeps reminding me of Key. I need to stop thinking of him 4real. And Samuel is crazy!-he’s sum guy on the internet- MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!!!

Blink Blink

Okay, I find it interesting that people whom I am mad at feel they should talk to me even when knowing I am upset with them. 2 girls, 1 boy, and a teacher. All of whom feel the need to further cement my rage toward them by comming up to my face dispite the fact that I already told or warned them of my indifference toward them. Stupid brave idiots. I will not call Key this week. He now has my number and if he doesn’t call, oh well. -smile- Also, I kind of don’t know why I was sad today. I really should be happy because its snowing and I’m eating twizlers(my happy candy) but something is bothering me. I don’t know what. C.A and I are officially not talking and you know what? I don’t care. At all. Which shows me that even though he might of understood me, he didn’t actually know me. Hmm. Samuel is an interesting person to talk to, but I feel as though I’m using him… Why? Because everytime I don’t talk to Key, I talk to him. Interesting. What is it with Key man?! I don’t understand these feelings at all. It’s confusing me. And you want to know something that scares me the most? Not only can I not successfully put him out of my mind, I want, no, crave a hug from him. -shudder- scary. I will hurt my sister if she doesn’t stop bothering me. I swear.

Words can make a difference

Well, small words can make a difference in how you view someone and how you feel toward them. “I was really looking forward to it…” Hmmm. Interesting. Said in a way that was genuine or just something to fill the empty conversation? Well, I hope it was the first because it put a smile on my face. It also puts a smile to my face when  I start thinking about it because I had a pretty much pissy day. Not going to get into it. But oh well, I wonder how many times you could call someone before they get annoyed….

Help

I would like to start a new page on my own. Any suggestions?…. Um, I also have another problem. What if you stop liking someone you really want to like? (giggles). I mean, you know you like them but your not allowing yourself to fully like them?

Okay, there has been a change

So yesterdays comments were retarded. There would be a key. I just only suffered from karma and alittle bit of the green monster. (giggles) so neway, I’m still going to go to the movies. Aslo, my average went up from a 83 to a 91! oh ma freaken gawsh. I was so happy. . Um, how do you behave on a first date?

Oh well

Yea, so I’m sorry for the false hopes guys. Key is a undercover jerk. (giggles) Past experiences have taught me that when a boy flirts with your best friend, theres going to be a problem. He could have been joking but I was burned already with that road. Oh well, kinda hurt in the beginning. Was about to hang up but now I dont feel anything. Really hoped he was different. Oh wells. NO movies. NO Key. NO C.A. (kinda sad about that) And the worst part is, and I don’t know why, but I almost feel like if I’m gonna cry because of the disappointment. Oh well. you live and you learn. You might say that I’m judging to fast but right now, I’m just protecting my heart. Smh. Okay, it kinda hurts righting this so Ill blog 2morrow hopefully on a happier note.

Its snowing!

Yeay! It’s snowing now! That means its going to snow on my birthday! (I really hope). So anyway, I’m so happy because I’m getting more views and comments. Really appreciate it! So Im trying to type this fast because my mother wants to be a female dog and making me clean the whole dang house before we go to church. So yes, I would like to set up a new page and create a domain. Mind you, I have no idea how to do it but advice would help! . In other news, C.A and I aren’t talking which, for the first time in four years, doesn’t bother me. He’s a grown man (20) so I’m done with tellling him when he’s making a mistake. Oh, and the girl that I thought was still my best friend isn’t. I realized how much I hate talking to her now. She kinda gets me sick because she’s trying to be a female pimp which I loathe. Talking about loathe, I found out that I am kind of what I loathe in other people. I am just a needy person sometimes. Like, I need attention, but I wouldn’t tell you. Hence, I would get mad at you if I don’t get attention but I wouldn’t throw a hissy fit. I would laugh it off. Talking about laughing (gtl)(giggles) I realize I laugh for alot of different reasons. Would get onto that later. Have a video to show you guys, its funny
 

Watch this Japanese illusionist/street magician at work. Apparently he’s a young guy who disguises himself as an elderly man.  But he’s incredible – I don’t know how he does the lean but, wait until the end, you’ve never seen anything like it!!

http://images2.jokaroo.net/videos/grandpajapan.wmv

Dreams drama dreams

Welp, (yea i know i have a habit of starting with it) I’ve been having so many damn dreams about Key and drama with C.A. Okay, when I talk to C.A I am now walking on egg shells. I DO NOT DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS!! I don’t think he gets that. Dude wants me to be his “gurl” but seems to forget that he lives in florida and i live in nyc…. ug. smh. on top of that, i realized that my ex-best friend is actualli infact still my sort of best friend. hmmm. interesting. and Key…well….idk about him still. My feelings got unlocked so i still like the idiot. and bloomberg must be OUT OF HIS MIND!!! I used to think he was a good mayor, but what hes trying to do now is so retarded that its not worth mentioning. To sumerize this, basically he wants the poor to get poorer. sigh. when will this end?! and Key needs to GET OUT OF MA HEAD!!

How does this happen?

Well, I have no idea what is the matter with C.A. We were talking again and he said something that confused the living daylights out of me.
Him: I feel differently about you than I feel about (insert any girls name here)
Me: I know right? I feel the same way except its about you and Key.
Him: Yeah, I don’t know either..
Me: Yeah, don’t you feel like if me and you are super besties? (giggles)
Him: Yeah… no wait! You down playing our relationship now?
(Me thinking uh oh). Me: (laugh nervously).
So I don’t know what’s up with him. He’s my bestie whether he wants to be or not. Oh, and me and Key finally talked. But the thing is… I kind of turned off my emotions regarding him so I don’t know what I feel for him anymore. Yes, I know, I’m a difficult person. (giggles). He keeps running through my mind WAY too much. Oh yea! I just remembered! I AM ON FIRE!!! I keep getting hundreds on my mid terms so Im gonna b back in my 90 average!!! YEAY!!! (giggles…belly laughs) Mabye even higher. Johns Hopkins University, HERE I COME!!!